doom letter #3

Tomorrow, Tuesday January 20th, 2009, Barack Obama and a rabid gang of hangers on will have their first big moment. I have already went over and over the down side of Obama’s presidency, so today I am going to tell you what my inauguration day would be like if I were Barack.

First of all, I would not put any spending limits on things. If some of the guests want beluga and Kristal, get it by the case. They are his believers, they should be treated well. After all, the next day they will all have to go back to what is left of their lives and begin the reconciliation between their dreams and their realities. I am a strong believer in temporary delusion to celebrate a special occasion. My take on it is why not? The ‘money’ that will pay for all of it is quickly becoming a sick joke for all that see what is happening with the economy. So by all means, spend it now. There is no time like the present, seize the day, or whatever cliche you deem appropriate.

The day should not be all play though. This is an opportunity to tell the crowd gathered and the millions of others that will be taking it in through media that this will be the last party for a little while. Starting Wednesday the elite will have to start trying to work their magic to keep the illusion of a middle-income investor class afloat. They will have to come up with a solution to all of the zombie corporations that are stalking congress, the Fed, the treasury and anyone else with printing press access to pump more money into the black hole of a broken dream. Also starting Wednesday, the vast majority of us will have to wake up to a relative stranger that has all of the power of George Bush without the bad reputation. At least a portion of the speech should be dedicated to outlining how he will end the unconstitutional practices of the previous administration. The rest of us will also have to start down the uncertain road to the future. With the backdrop of impending resource depletion and a near-universally unprepared populace another chunk of the speech should tell the masses that the American dream as it has been sold is likely over.

The big chunk of us who have no skills in the production or maintenance of anything tangible are going to be in the worst trouble. If you are reading this, then you are likely in a little better shape because at least your mind is open to what the future may bring. Reality isn’t a popular subject in modern culture, “reality” has taken its place. If things get bad we can just go on TV and sing, answer trivia questions, dodge a wall, make out with a washed up celebrity or swap wives for a couple weeks to get us out of our troubles. And if things really get bad, those nice people from TV will either come and build us a new vinyl/particle board house or throw a yard sale for us and do some decorating to spruce things up.

I feel bad for Obama because I really do think he is a decent dude that probably wants to do something right. On the flip side of that, he is an over-achieving product of the ivy league establishment that is probably at least a little mentally ill to put himself out there the way he has in order to get elected. His soul was sold 100 times over in the process, surely, in order to raise the amount of money he did and overcome the former favorite of the liberal establishments, the Clintons.

Due to the soul-selling that he has done, he won’t be able to say the big things. But he can take the opportunity to tell the people that there may be a new sacrifice required for the American people. It will definitely mean less credit, lower asset values and higher prices on the goods required for basic survival. I think it would be a good idea to use policy to encourage garden planting as well as fruit and nut trees across the country. If techno-capitalists do manage to save the day, at worst we will have to pay someone to cut the trees down and re-plant grass over the gardens.

I don’t know what tomorrow will bring, but it will likely be a speech based in a vague cornucopian hope for the next for years. But if he has the fortitude he will dig deep and tell the people what they need to hear, not what they want to hear.

Otherwise, I want to say lucky you President O. You get the job you have probably always wanted at possibly the most dire economic moment in American history. Take time to enjoy the party with your donors, followers and fans. Wednesday is going to be the beginning of the end of life in America as we know it.

So doomed,

mike