doom letter #22

Dear Well-to-do Baby Boomers,

I saw you at the Tea Party Convention in Nashville and you are a sad bunch of people. Your convention reminded me of an AARP meeting for only racist members. It is unfortunate that this is the best top-down “movement” that dethroned conservatives can muster. I understand that you dislike the president, I do too. I just wish that you wouldn’t cloak your shit in so much nonsensical patriotism. If you want a revolution, as some at the convention stated, then I am with you. Unless you mean a revolution like 1994, which was not a revolution at all even though the thought of it gives you all boners.

So, aside from the fact that the vast majority of the convention was just a money-making scheme for the promoters and vendors, I was depressed to see that your key-note speaker was Sarah Palin and the next name that got big press was Tom Tancredo. Are you fucking for real? The crazy dude from the 08 presidential primaries and the publiciteer from Wasilla? Why not just hire me to come up on stage and take a crap while reading from their books. It would have been way cheaper, and you would have got the same inspirational message. Also, I could have taken a crap. Aside from the demographics, this was the icing on the cake for me. You are clearly not serious about changing anything in this country other than the puppet that sits on the throne.

I want you to realize that this country is totally fucked, but not because of the socialist president – about as socialist as one can be while bowing to his corporate masters and propping up a dead economy for the betterment of Wall Street bankers. Don’t you understand anything at all? He re-appointed your Fed chairman, escalated one of your wars and cut your taxes. Yeah, he’s a real socialist mad man. The solution to the whole mess isn’t to put a dimwit like Sarah Palin into the White House. The real solution is to blow up the White House and start from scratch.

But I understand you don’t really give a shit about the future of this country, and I don’t blame you. You give a shit about your own interests, which are vested in the stability of the status quo, with a slightly more reddish hue.

My closing advice to you is to either kill yourselves immediately, hopefully taking a few other tea partisans with you in the process, or to wake the fuck up. We have an empire to dismantle and an economy to reformat and there is not an abundance of time or materials available to make it happen. The longer you spend thinking about your retirement plans, the shorter our window of opportunity gets. So lets get serious, stop jerking each other off and start working on a future that has some hope of survival before it is too late.

Get on board for the boat drinks or get the fuck off of the earth,

mike